Monday, May 31, 2004
The Hope That Kills Us...
...is the name of an anthology of Scottish football fiction that I picked up in Glasgow last month. Can't recommend it highly enough to anyone who likes (or even hates) Scottish football and contemporary Scottish writing.
I'm no English graduate and not much of a book reviewer either, but the stories are diverse enough in style that you'll enjoy some if not most of them. I particularly enjoyed "Nae C*nt Said Anyhin", an only slightly surreal tale of a footballing gift of genius; and if you like Gordon Legge, you'll love his contribution, "The Hand of God Squad". There are excellent contributions by some new (to me) writers as well.
Some of the expected Scottish themes are present - sectarianism, maudlin sentimentalism, the wife not understanding... but they're done well in an understated way. And one or two of the stories are, well, a wee bit out there, but none the worse for it.
Go buy the book.
Hardback with reviews - Amazon.co.uk
Paperback without the reviews - Amazon.co.uk
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I'm no English graduate and not much of a book reviewer either, but the stories are diverse enough in style that you'll enjoy some if not most of them. I particularly enjoyed "Nae C*nt Said Anyhin", an only slightly surreal tale of a footballing gift of genius; and if you like Gordon Legge, you'll love his contribution, "The Hand of God Squad". There are excellent contributions by some new (to me) writers as well.
Some of the expected Scottish themes are present - sectarianism, maudlin sentimentalism, the wife not understanding... but they're done well in an understated way. And one or two of the stories are, well, a wee bit out there, but none the worse for it.
Go buy the book.
Hardback with reviews - Amazon.co.uk
Paperback without the reviews - Amazon.co.uk
0 comments
Berti can do no right
If people saw me walking on water you can be sure someone would say, "Look at that Berti Vogts: he can't even swim!"
That was a quote from Berti Vogts describing his relationship with the German press [thanks Kenny] and he should keep it handy for his time in Scotland too.
For a couple of years he's been slaughtered for a series of poor results in meaningless friendlies against good teams; now we have a couple of good results in meaningless friendlies against mediocre teams, and he doesn't even get grudging praise. Cannae win, eh.
What is even more galling about this article is it illustrates the way the Scottish football 'hackerati' close in and defend each other from criticism, in this case Rob Robertson trying to make out the anger directed towards Charlie Nicholas is unfair and hypocritical. I don't remember too many occasions when the TA have been screaming for Berti's head in public, Rob, care to name them? Sure a lot of us have doubts but those are kept away from the pitch. 6-0 down in the Arena but no-one was singing 'Berti must go', that would have been the press box chorus.
Way back when Vogts was announced as manager, the press were making an issue of his poor standing with the German press - clearly they'd made a few phone calls to their buddies over at Bild, that exemplar of high journalism. Thing is, no-one really gives a shit how Berti gets on with the press except the press themselves, but boy have they had their knives out since day one, and sadly too many people let themselves be led by what our tabloid tattlers have to sensationalise.
For what it's worth, the since the debacles in Amsterdam and Wales, the team seems to be on an upwards trajectory and appears to be playing with a bit more structure and confidence. Winning in the Baltics had never been easy for Scotland, and you don't often score 4 goals against a team that's FIFA-ranked in your neighbourhood, so there are positives to be taken from these games against so-called 'diddy' teams. [And did I see the Herald's "hapless" Estonia draw 2-2 with Denmark this weekend? I think I did!] Quashie has had a chance to stake a claim for a regular berth, Mackay has had a chance to bed down, we've tried out a few more fullbacks, and the eager Fletcher and MacFadden have had more time to get comfortable at international level.
Roll on the qualifiers.
Scotland 4 - 1 Trinidad & Tobago - The Herald
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That was a quote from Berti Vogts describing his relationship with the German press [thanks Kenny] and he should keep it handy for his time in Scotland too.
For a couple of years he's been slaughtered for a series of poor results in meaningless friendlies against good teams; now we have a couple of good results in meaningless friendlies against mediocre teams, and he doesn't even get grudging praise. Cannae win, eh.
What is even more galling about this article is it illustrates the way the Scottish football 'hackerati' close in and defend each other from criticism, in this case Rob Robertson trying to make out the anger directed towards Charlie Nicholas is unfair and hypocritical. I don't remember too many occasions when the TA have been screaming for Berti's head in public, Rob, care to name them? Sure a lot of us have doubts but those are kept away from the pitch. 6-0 down in the Arena but no-one was singing 'Berti must go', that would have been the press box chorus.
Way back when Vogts was announced as manager, the press were making an issue of his poor standing with the German press - clearly they'd made a few phone calls to their buddies over at Bild, that exemplar of high journalism. Thing is, no-one really gives a shit how Berti gets on with the press except the press themselves, but boy have they had their knives out since day one, and sadly too many people let themselves be led by what our tabloid tattlers have to sensationalise.
For what it's worth, the since the debacles in Amsterdam and Wales, the team seems to be on an upwards trajectory and appears to be playing with a bit more structure and confidence. Winning in the Baltics had never been easy for Scotland, and you don't often score 4 goals against a team that's FIFA-ranked in your neighbourhood, so there are positives to be taken from these games against so-called 'diddy' teams. [And did I see the Herald's "hapless" Estonia draw 2-2 with Denmark this weekend? I think I did!] Quashie has had a chance to stake a claim for a regular berth, Mackay has had a chance to bed down, we've tried out a few more fullbacks, and the eager Fletcher and MacFadden have had more time to get comfortable at international level.
Roll on the qualifiers.
Scotland 4 - 1 Trinidad & Tobago - The Herald
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Saturday, May 29, 2004
When Maradona enchanted Hampden
Nothing to add, just read the article - beautiful stuff. Shame the writer isn't credited.
Read - Scotsman
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Read - Scotsman
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Wednesday, May 26, 2004
Aiden McGeady is a wank
Surely he's taking the piss - he used to go on holiday to Donegal so he wants to play for Ireland? My folks took me to Waterford when I was a kid, can I get a game Mr Kerr?
McGeady is a disgusting wee glory-hunting f*cker who wants to play for Ireland because he thinks he'll get to the World Cup more often. Does he think his "hero" (my arse) Roy Keane would be playing for Scotland if the Republic were as shite as they were in the 70s and he had a granny from Methil? No he wouldn't, because Keane might be a b*stard but he's got a bit more dignity and pride than that.
Aiden is unique among Ireland's "imports" because the rest of them would never have got a game for their home teams - it was Ireland or nothing, and I'm sure most of them would have picked England over Ireland had they had the chance.
So f*ck off McGeady, Ireland can have you, and I feel sorry for them.
Read - Herald Sport
Please note that this post was written as a Scotland supporter, not as a Bluenose, so do not consider it the ravings of a bigoted Hun.
9 comments
McGeady is a disgusting wee glory-hunting f*cker who wants to play for Ireland because he thinks he'll get to the World Cup more often. Does he think his "hero" (my arse) Roy Keane would be playing for Scotland if the Republic were as shite as they were in the 70s and he had a granny from Methil? No he wouldn't, because Keane might be a b*stard but he's got a bit more dignity and pride than that.
Aiden is unique among Ireland's "imports" because the rest of them would never have got a game for their home teams - it was Ireland or nothing, and I'm sure most of them would have picked England over Ireland had they had the chance.
So f*ck off McGeady, Ireland can have you, and I feel sorry for them.
Read - Herald Sport
Please note that this post was written as a Scotland supporter, not as a Bluenose, so do not consider it the ravings of a bigoted Hun.
9 comments
Tales of Tallinn
The build-up to the Estonia friendly has been overshadowed by the domestic and European cup finals (not forgetting the beatification of Saint Henrik) so it's possibly the lowest-key Scotland game in a long time. Nice to see Fletcher getting into the record books with the nod for captain, and hopefully he can do one better than the last time we played in the land of the Eestis.
I have no idea how strong the Estonia line-up is but it looks like there will be a few untested Scots out there so a win may not be a walk in the park. The defence looks solid enough but the midfield is likely to include uncapped Pompey players Richard Hughes (just 10 appearances this season, including 2 as sub in the FA Cup in which he was booked both times) and Nigel Quashie (listed as English on the Portsmouth website); the third of the quartet is jinxed-but-unbeaten Gary Holt leaving Darren Fletcher as the only one who would be in Scotland's first XI.
Up front the Herald has Crawford paired with Miller while the Scotsman thinks McFadden will be preferred to the Fifer - and given the SFA website has Faddy up front I'd go with the Edinburgh paper's opinion.
Nothing less than a win should be accepted, and a few goals would be nice for a change, but Estonia will play a hard game so I expect no more than a narrow, low-scoring victory. Prove me wrong please.
Read - Herald Sport
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I have no idea how strong the Estonia line-up is but it looks like there will be a few untested Scots out there so a win may not be a walk in the park. The defence looks solid enough but the midfield is likely to include uncapped Pompey players Richard Hughes (just 10 appearances this season, including 2 as sub in the FA Cup in which he was booked both times) and Nigel Quashie (listed as English on the Portsmouth website); the third of the quartet is jinxed-but-unbeaten Gary Holt leaving Darren Fletcher as the only one who would be in Scotland's first XI.
Up front the Herald has Crawford paired with Miller while the Scotsman thinks McFadden will be preferred to the Fifer - and given the SFA website has Faddy up front I'd go with the Edinburgh paper's opinion.
Nothing less than a win should be accepted, and a few goals would be nice for a change, but Estonia will play a hard game so I expect no more than a narrow, low-scoring victory. Prove me wrong please.
Read - Herald Sport
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It's Miller Time
Even more daring moves afoot at Aberdeen this week - I don't think many people expected Steve Paterson to get the boot just yet.
Things have been brewing for a while though, with this article by Willie Miller staking his claim a couple of weeks ago. Clearly chairman Stewart Milne reads the P&J - I'd be surprised if he doesn't because virtually everyone north of Stonehaven does - and has decided to take radical action as requested by the dodgily-'tached Dons legend.
Miller states that he would want a "role with teeth" but he doesn't say exactly what that means... he alludes to Fergus McCann but the situation is very different. McCann was taking over a basket-case of an organisation which had *enormous* untapped potential, using his own money therefore providing himself complete control over decision-making. Willie Miller will be playing with other people's money, for a start; and though Aberdeen have clearly been underperforming for a number of years, the potential for them is to be, at best, Scotland's third club - and challenging for European honours is simply an impossible dream.
While it would seem he has complete control over footballing affairs, is that any different from the standard "Director of Football" role? Isn't that what Keith Burkinshaw did for a few years, before being let go to save cash (around the time they got rid of the players' toaster, if I remember rightly). If he proposes a new training facility, or an academy, or a three-week trip to the USA for pre-season, how is that going to be funded? Also if they do get Calderwood in as manager - not a bad choice - who decides on transfer targets?
While I applaud the Dons for their willingness to take a risk, I'm not convinced the move has been thought through fully, and without some financial backing I'm not really sure what's different, other than getting a new manager and some good PR with the fans.
Read - Scotsman
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Things have been brewing for a while though, with this article by Willie Miller staking his claim a couple of weeks ago. Clearly chairman Stewart Milne reads the P&J - I'd be surprised if he doesn't because virtually everyone north of Stonehaven does - and has decided to take radical action as requested by the dodgily-'tached Dons legend.
Miller states that he would want a "role with teeth" but he doesn't say exactly what that means... he alludes to Fergus McCann but the situation is very different. McCann was taking over a basket-case of an organisation which had *enormous* untapped potential, using his own money therefore providing himself complete control over decision-making. Willie Miller will be playing with other people's money, for a start; and though Aberdeen have clearly been underperforming for a number of years, the potential for them is to be, at best, Scotland's third club - and challenging for European honours is simply an impossible dream.
While it would seem he has complete control over footballing affairs, is that any different from the standard "Director of Football" role? Isn't that what Keith Burkinshaw did for a few years, before being let go to save cash (around the time they got rid of the players' toaster, if I remember rightly). If he proposes a new training facility, or an academy, or a three-week trip to the USA for pre-season, how is that going to be funded? Also if they do get Calderwood in as manager - not a bad choice - who decides on transfer targets?
While I applaud the Dons for their willingness to take a risk, I'm not convinced the move has been thought through fully, and without some financial backing I'm not really sure what's different, other than getting a new manager and some good PR with the fans.
Read - Scotsman
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Mogga the Manager
So a surprise appointment for the position of Hibs manager; one that shows a fair bit of enterprise and willingness to take risk on behalf of the Easter Road board, which should be applauded in these times of uncertainty for Scottish football; even more so given Hibs' experience with their last untried manager, Franck Sauzee.
I like the language used by Rod Petrie in describing why they went for Mowbray - words like character, honesty, dignity, leadership - and I hope he turns out to be the right man for the job. He would seem to have good coaching credentials and Ipswich play good football, so the development of kids like Riordan and Thompson might be enhanced - future Scotland players, if they apply themselves correctly.
Mowbray does make some, shall we say, naive comments about how he'll deal with up-and-coming stars - "I’ll talk to the young players about what goes on behind their eyes" - I'd watch that one Tony, you might not find much at all...
Read - Scotsman
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I like the language used by Rod Petrie in describing why they went for Mowbray - words like character, honesty, dignity, leadership - and I hope he turns out to be the right man for the job. He would seem to have good coaching credentials and Ipswich play good football, so the development of kids like Riordan and Thompson might be enhanced - future Scotland players, if they apply themselves correctly.
Mowbray does make some, shall we say, naive comments about how he'll deal with up-and-coming stars - "I’ll talk to the young players about what goes on behind their eyes" - I'd watch that one Tony, you might not find much at all...
Read - Scotsman
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Tuesday, May 25, 2004
James Bond, Karaoke, and Grangemouth
Saw Clive Owen outside the Tribeca Grand Hotel last night. Apparently he's the next James Bond, so I asked him if he was going to follow in Big Sean's footsteps and become a supporter of the Scottish National Party. He just looked at me while his minder told me to get lost.
I was there to see ex-Tricky co-star Martina Topley-Bird. It was pretty good, and even got a bit Karaoke at the end - her auntie was invited up on stage to sing backing vocals, and stuck around for the encore which was a song she didn't know at all. She managed pretty well, considering.
Martina's auntie must have been well into her seventies, as was the guy who got up on stage at the Grangemouth Rangers Supporters club a few years ago before a Falkirk-Rangers game; shushed the crowd of two or three hundred Rangers fans; and proceeded to start a chorus of "Follow, Follow". However it quickly became apparent this guy didn't know the words - he seemed to have his own set of bizarre lyrics - so the crowd promptly cracked up laughing and then called him the proverbial taxi.
I've always wondered about that guy. Given he was in his seventies, had he been singing the wrong words all those years? Was he just really drunk, or stagestruck, or both? I'd like to think it's the latter, but maybe there are hundreds of old punters around who have been singing the wrong words all these years.
Are YOU sure you're singing the right lyrics?
PS. The Clive Owen thing was a lie - I did see him outside but didn't mention Sean or anything. Sorry.
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I was there to see ex-Tricky co-star Martina Topley-Bird. It was pretty good, and even got a bit Karaoke at the end - her auntie was invited up on stage to sing backing vocals, and stuck around for the encore which was a song she didn't know at all. She managed pretty well, considering.
Martina's auntie must have been well into her seventies, as was the guy who got up on stage at the Grangemouth Rangers Supporters club a few years ago before a Falkirk-Rangers game; shushed the crowd of two or three hundred Rangers fans; and proceeded to start a chorus of "Follow, Follow". However it quickly became apparent this guy didn't know the words - he seemed to have his own set of bizarre lyrics - so the crowd promptly cracked up laughing and then called him the proverbial taxi.
I've always wondered about that guy. Given he was in his seventies, had he been singing the wrong words all those years? Was he just really drunk, or stagestruck, or both? I'd like to think it's the latter, but maybe there are hundreds of old punters around who have been singing the wrong words all these years.
Are YOU sure you're singing the right lyrics?
PS. The Clive Owen thing was a lie - I did see him outside but didn't mention Sean or anything. Sorry.
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Friday, May 21, 2004
Speaking of the BBC
One of Gazzetta's many inside informers gave me access to BBC Scotland's Queen Margaret Drive HQ recently. Wandering down the corridors I came across the menacingly-titled "Sport Vault".
Is this where they keep the tape of Jimmy Sandison accusing a caller of mendacity? Perhaps they could prove or disprove the story my mate Drew once told me about David Francey exclaiming "the c*nts have scored" when Celtic scored during an Old Firm game. Oh what treasures must lie within! Surely they could redeploy some of their Sportscene production team to uncover and rebroadcast classic footage?
(Apologies for the awful image quality - PalmOne Treo camera doesn't do so well in poor light)
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Is this where they keep the tape of Jimmy Sandison accusing a caller of mendacity? Perhaps they could prove or disprove the story my mate Drew once told me about David Francey exclaiming "the c*nts have scored" when Celtic scored during an Old Firm game. Oh what treasures must lie within! Surely they could redeploy some of their Sportscene production team to uncover and rebroadcast classic footage?
(Apologies for the awful image quality - PalmOne Treo camera doesn't do so well in poor light)
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Thursday, May 20, 2004
Sportscene shuts down
I worked one summer in a lemonade factory (no, really) where the partially mental owner barely managed to keep control of his partially reprobate staff. His ultimate weapon was a threat to send you "doon the road" which meant the receiving the P45, aka pink slip, aka jotters.
Of course no-one likes to see anyone lose their livelihood, but when it's Chick Young's "job" at the BBC, it's hard not to take at least a wee bit of satisfaction from it. After all, why should he get paid? As far as I can tell, on a weekly basis, this is his list of tasks:
Oh and on international duty - he travels the world topping up his very fake tan and sampling the prostitutes (Estonia and Hong Kong I know for sure and no doubt countless other locations).
Easy money. There's about two million punters in Scotland who could do it just as well.
Read - Scotsman
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Of course no-one likes to see anyone lose their livelihood, but when it's Chick Young's "job" at the BBC, it's hard not to take at least a wee bit of satisfaction from it. After all, why should he get paid? As far as I can tell, on a weekly basis, this is his list of tasks:
- file a stupid wee "funny story" or an unenlightening "match preview"
- hang around the dugout during live games hoping to listen in on something interesting you can pass on ("It's his knee that's hurt Rob, he's hurt his knee is what they're saying")
- interrupt one of the managers on his way back to the dressing-room at half-time (which is while he's working, remember)
- ask some even less enlightening questions after the game, in an arse-licking or fake sympathetic fashion depending on who you're talking to
- all the while, behave like the total sycophant you are
Oh and on international duty - he travels the world topping up his very fake tan and sampling the prostitutes (Estonia and Hong Kong I know for sure and no doubt countless other locations).
Easy money. There's about two million punters in Scotland who could do it just as well.
Read - Scotsman
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Wednesday, May 19, 2004
GAZZETTA EXCLUSIVE: McLeish in for Collina
Alex McLeish has launched a shock bid to bring baldy Italian superstar ref Pierluigi Collina to Ibrox, Gazzetta Football Scozia can exclusively reveal.
McLeish sees Collina, along with the Rae brothers Gavin and Alex, as the solution to his team's flyweight midfield problems. "Alex thinks Pierluigi can boss a game around like nobody's business," an Ibrox insider told Gazzetta. "Mikel Arteta is frankly a bit of a poser, what with the hairband and all, and isn't really hacking it as a midfield general; but Collina wouldn't let himself get pushed around by the likes of Lennon and Thompson. And Alex thinks it might help us get some dodgy penalty awards again; we haven't had enough of those this season."
Collina's impressive performance in today's UEFA Cup Final was believed to be the tipping-point for a Rangers bid. McLeish was watching the game on a portable TV in his bedroom and as soon as the game was done, he was on the phone toDavid Murray John McClelland asking for permission to move.
Euro 2004 was expected to be Collina's last major tournament, and under Italian league rules he was due to retire in 2005 having reached the age of 45; it is believed a Rangers bid would be welcomed by the scary bug-eyed man in the middle as he could prolong his career for several years in one of Europe's top leagues, geographically. The Rangers manager does not believe Collina's age will be a problem, and in fact sees his experience - including a World Cup Final and many Champions League campaigns - as beneficial to the youngsters in the squad.
Collina is delighted with the news
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McLeish sees Collina, along with the Rae brothers Gavin and Alex, as the solution to his team's flyweight midfield problems. "Alex thinks Pierluigi can boss a game around like nobody's business," an Ibrox insider told Gazzetta. "Mikel Arteta is frankly a bit of a poser, what with the hairband and all, and isn't really hacking it as a midfield general; but Collina wouldn't let himself get pushed around by the likes of Lennon and Thompson. And Alex thinks it might help us get some dodgy penalty awards again; we haven't had enough of those this season."
Collina's impressive performance in today's UEFA Cup Final was believed to be the tipping-point for a Rangers bid. McLeish was watching the game on a portable TV in his bedroom and as soon as the game was done, he was on the phone to
Euro 2004 was expected to be Collina's last major tournament, and under Italian league rules he was due to retire in 2005 having reached the age of 45; it is believed a Rangers bid would be welcomed by the scary bug-eyed man in the middle as he could prolong his career for several years in one of Europe's top leagues, geographically. The Rangers manager does not believe Collina's age will be a problem, and in fact sees his experience - including a World Cup Final and many Champions League campaigns - as beneficial to the youngsters in the squad.
Collina is delighted with the news
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Tuesday, May 18, 2004
Billy's Index
Distance from Inverness to Aberdeen, in miles: 103.3
Estimated time to drive between the two cities: 3 hours, 22 minutes
Last train leaving Inverness before 3pm kickoff at Pittodrie: 12.19pm
Earliest arrival of return train after final whistle: 8.32pm
Most recent season a team was relegated from the SPL when the team name didn't begin with "St": 1998/99
Goal difference of best team in Scotland: +80
Goal difference of worst team in Scotland: -88
Number of caps received by East Stirling's most capped player: 5
For: Wales
Percentage of SPL teams with a positive goal difference in season 2003/04: 25
Percentage of SFL Division One teams with a positive goal difference in season 2003/04: 50
Percentage of Welsh Premier League teams with a positive goal difference in season 2003/04: 47.06
Number of hits on amazon.co.uk for "Henrik Larsson": 3
Of which are classical music CDs: 1
Number of hits on amazon.co.uk for "Brian Laudrup": 4
Of which are classical music CDs: 0
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Estimated time to drive between the two cities: 3 hours, 22 minutes
Last train leaving Inverness before 3pm kickoff at Pittodrie: 12.19pm
Earliest arrival of return train after final whistle: 8.32pm
Most recent season a team was relegated from the SPL when the team name didn't begin with "St": 1998/99
Goal difference of best team in Scotland: +80
Goal difference of worst team in Scotland: -88
Number of caps received by East Stirling's most capped player: 5
For: Wales
Percentage of SPL teams with a positive goal difference in season 2003/04: 25
Percentage of SFL Division One teams with a positive goal difference in season 2003/04: 50
Percentage of Welsh Premier League teams with a positive goal difference in season 2003/04: 47.06
Number of hits on amazon.co.uk for "Henrik Larsson": 3
Of which are classical music CDs: 1
Number of hits on amazon.co.uk for "Brian Laudrup": 4
Of which are classical music CDs: 0
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Monday, May 17, 2004
Trivia
Who was the last non-Old-Firm team to win the league? Which season? (Sad, isn't it.) Who was runner-up? Which team whose name begins with D got relegated? Who finished higher - Hearts or Hibs?
No googling now...
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No googling now...
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Sunday, May 16, 2004
Rumsfeld denies new torture in Abu-Ghraib
Evidence has been received of a new form of shame and humiliation for Iraqi prisoners in Baghdad:
(Thanks Malky)
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(Thanks Malky)
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Own a slice of Scotland's pain
I occasionally peruse eBay for football memorabilia, and have a favourite search set up specifically for old Scotland jerseys (enter "Scotland (football, soccer) shirt" and you'll get a pretty accurate selection). Over the last few years this has given me a decent collection of jerseys from the last 20 years - usually ones that I bought full-price and then chucked out when the SFA introduced a new shirt. Most vintage shirts tend to cost only a tenner or so, definitely better value than any new top with a bit more prestige too.
However on having a look tonight, a horror turned up sending me screaming to the floor in agony: the jersey worn by Rafael van der Vaart when Holland humped Scotland last November. Devastating.
Go to eBay item
Read - Rafael's thoughts on the game from his website
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However on having a look tonight, a horror turned up sending me screaming to the floor in agony: the jersey worn by Rafael van der Vaart when Holland humped Scotland last November. Devastating.
Go to eBay item
Read - Rafael's thoughts on the game from his website
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Saturday, May 15, 2004
Johannesburg to host Scotland's first World Cup victory
FIFA have announced that South Africa will host the 2010 World Cup Finals, therefore Johannesburg's Soccer City stadium will be the site of the historic first World Cup win by Scotland.
Contacted by Gazzetta just before Manchester United's game against Aston Villa, Darren Fletcher confirmed his delight and stated "I am glad FIFA have chosen South Africa, and it will truly be an honour to be the first person to hold the World Cup aloft in victory on the African continent. I am looking forward to captaining Scotland in the final."
Nelson Mandela could not be contacted immediately but his representatives stated: "Nelson is a huge fan of Scotland's cheeky boy, James McFadden, and he hopes that South Africa can play in the final against Faddy, Fletcher, and friends."
Read - South Africa 2010 Bid
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Contacted by Gazzetta just before Manchester United's game against Aston Villa, Darren Fletcher confirmed his delight and stated "I am glad FIFA have chosen South Africa, and it will truly be an honour to be the first person to hold the World Cup aloft in victory on the African continent. I am looking forward to captaining Scotland in the final."
Nelson Mandela could not be contacted immediately but his representatives stated: "Nelson is a huge fan of Scotland's cheeky boy, James McFadden, and he hopes that South Africa can play in the final against Faddy, Fletcher, and friends."
Read - South Africa 2010 Bid
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100 grand for a real-life game of Championship Manager?
Claude Anelka's "takeover" of Raith Rovers coaching appears highly dubious. In return for a 'six-figure' investment in the club, he gets complete control over footballing matters in Kirkcaldy... the successful and popular manager Calderon has already resigned, a number of players have been told they are no longer required, and Anelka is bringing in a group of French amateurs who want to be professionals.
Looks like Raith have whored themselves for some quick cash, a chunk of which will have to go to Calderon in settlement. Clearly Anelka - a footballing 'agent' who has lived off his brother's numerous transfers - is in it to provide players he controls a shop window, so he can make money off the back of their transfers out of Fife.
I suppose the Rovers could do well if he brings in good players, but it seems a huge gamble to take; they could be right diddies, or they could certainly look like diddies on the Starks Park pitch, of which Tommy Burns once opined "even Jesus Christ couldn't play on that surface."
Read - Scotsman
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Looks like Raith have whored themselves for some quick cash, a chunk of which will have to go to Calderon in settlement. Clearly Anelka - a footballing 'agent' who has lived off his brother's numerous transfers - is in it to provide players he controls a shop window, so he can make money off the back of their transfers out of Fife.
I suppose the Rovers could do well if he brings in good players, but it seems a huge gamble to take; they could be right diddies, or they could certainly look like diddies on the Starks Park pitch, of which Tommy Burns once opined "even Jesus Christ couldn't play on that surface."
Read - Scotsman
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Thursday, May 13, 2004
Henrik, oh my Henrik
Is it because we're a small country or are our journalists just too dull to produce something different? Both Sunday papers had Henrik Larsson specials (though I bought the SoS in preference to the Herald because at least theirs wasn't a pullout!) and it appears BBC and STV are filming tribute programmes:
Great minds think alike. With the imminent departure of Swedish footballer Henrik Larsson, several papers have been rushing out commemorative supplements to mark what some folk may consider a momentous occasion. The Sunday Herald was first on the mark with its tribute pull-out but expect at least another two before the month is out.
Television too is on the case to make its own feature shows on the subject. So when a Henrik-hunting crew from BBC Scotland touched down in Scandinavia last week, they were rather unimpressed to find out that some of their potential Larsson-related interviewees had already spoken to … Scottish TV, who had been out previously to film material for… wait for it, another Henrik Larsson special. And most gallingly, STV’s show will be voiced by the same chap who did the talking over the recent Footballer’s Lives series, produced by the BBC. Small world, eh?
Read - ALLmediascotland.com (13th May)
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Great minds think alike. With the imminent departure of Swedish footballer Henrik Larsson, several papers have been rushing out commemorative supplements to mark what some folk may consider a momentous occasion. The Sunday Herald was first on the mark with its tribute pull-out but expect at least another two before the month is out.
Television too is on the case to make its own feature shows on the subject. So when a Henrik-hunting crew from BBC Scotland touched down in Scandinavia last week, they were rather unimpressed to find out that some of their potential Larsson-related interviewees had already spoken to … Scottish TV, who had been out previously to film material for… wait for it, another Henrik Larsson special. And most gallingly, STV’s show will be voiced by the same chap who did the talking over the recent Footballer’s Lives series, produced by the BBC. Small world, eh?
Read - ALLmediascotland.com (13th May)
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Gemmill deconstructed
From issue one of the Marshall Cavendish "Football Handbook" that I used to get and that I found in my mum's attic recently.
1 comments
Wednesday, May 12, 2004
Scottish football in the USA
Interesting article in the Aberdeen Press & Journal, of all places, talking about brand management in football in light of the recent activity at Liverpool (potential takeover by Thai PM) and Abramovich's Chelsea (they claim he basically got the football club for free).
The sale of English Premiership abroad generates big revenue - #104m per year in Asia alone - and the big EPL clubs sell a lot of jerseys worldwide (not forgetting Real Madrid's number 23). The English football 'brand' would seem to be strong, and anyone living in the US will know that - sellout tours for Man U, games on pay-per-view, weekly highlights packages.
But where does Scotland stand in relation to this? A few years back, things were looking good - Scotland played in the opening game of the World Cup finals; the Scottish league was on free-to-view Fox Sports Network, available nationwide; the captain of the American national team played for the top Scottish team; you could buy a Rangers jersey in Niketown. There appeared to be a chance to establish Scottish football in the US - not as the top league, but with the attraction of the Old Firm games [which really have no rival in Europe, as the Barca/Real 'derby' doesn't have enough away support to generate a proper atmosphere, in my view] there is definitely a niche to be filled. Throw in millions of people with a claim to Scottish heritage over here, tons of Irish-Americans, and how can you fail?
Well... we did. I met David Murray Jr at a Rangers conference in Vegas in '99, and despite assurances that Claudio would be used to market in the US, it never happened; and then he went to the English Premiership. Fox Sports lost the rights to show Scottish football, so you can only get it in a hundred or so bars nationwide, at $5-20 a pop; the national team is pants, hasn't qualified for diddly since 98, and is shown even in ever fewer bars. Scottish football's profile in the states is lower than Henrik Larsson's zip when Chick Young's giving him a blowjob.
Realistically, Rangers and Celtic are the teams people are going to follow from overseas. Celtic have the Irish diaspora to spread their word, and they appear to be heading in the right direction with their 'World Huddle' membership scheme and high-profile Champions World summer tours. If they get it right, because of the vast US-based Irish population, they could do very well indeed.
Rangers, on the other hand, are in a harder position - not least because of their history of bigotry, still perpetuated by many fans. As the article states, image is a big part of brand value; and a bunch of little-Englanders singing No Pope of Rome is not going to make your average Scots-American too proud of his heritage. [You can argue that Celtic and their fans are no angels, but the perception is key here and the perception is that Rangers are historically the bad boys.] There is no natural constituency for Rangers in the US, unlike Celtic's Irish emigrants, so the Gers have a hard task on their hands not to fall behind Celtic in the US. So maybe the best tactic for Rangers is to stall progress, and keep the Scottish league unknown to all but the dedicated few; which is what has happened, but more by accident than design, judging by the business acumen of the aforementioned Murray Jr.
My view? The Scottish League generates so little revenue (#1m/year) from overseas rights that they might as well give them away, in return for an agreement by a decent network (Fox or ESPN or even the Setanta Pub Network) to screen live games for free, every week. Do this for a few years, then follow it up with some (small) club tours against popular opposition - MLS teams or touring English teams - and then bring Scotland in as a guest team in the CONCACAF Cup to get some Tartan Army PR for free. Finally, throw in some soccer tourism to Scotland - after all, how much would your average American sports fan be amazed by the intensity of an Old Firm game, or even a decent Scotland international?
That would establish a core support - and then, the TV rights would be worth something, merchandise could be sold, and the profits ploughed back into the Scottish game. Meaning more pies for Chris Robinson, more biscuits in Celtic's tin, and the Ibrox overdraft falling under #100m. What is there to lose?
Read - Press and Journal
1 comments
The sale of English Premiership abroad generates big revenue - #104m per year in Asia alone - and the big EPL clubs sell a lot of jerseys worldwide (not forgetting Real Madrid's number 23). The English football 'brand' would seem to be strong, and anyone living in the US will know that - sellout tours for Man U, games on pay-per-view, weekly highlights packages.
But where does Scotland stand in relation to this? A few years back, things were looking good - Scotland played in the opening game of the World Cup finals; the Scottish league was on free-to-view Fox Sports Network, available nationwide; the captain of the American national team played for the top Scottish team; you could buy a Rangers jersey in Niketown. There appeared to be a chance to establish Scottish football in the US - not as the top league, but with the attraction of the Old Firm games [which really have no rival in Europe, as the Barca/Real 'derby' doesn't have enough away support to generate a proper atmosphere, in my view] there is definitely a niche to be filled. Throw in millions of people with a claim to Scottish heritage over here, tons of Irish-Americans, and how can you fail?
Well... we did. I met David Murray Jr at a Rangers conference in Vegas in '99, and despite assurances that Claudio would be used to market in the US, it never happened; and then he went to the English Premiership. Fox Sports lost the rights to show Scottish football, so you can only get it in a hundred or so bars nationwide, at $5-20 a pop; the national team is pants, hasn't qualified for diddly since 98, and is shown even in ever fewer bars. Scottish football's profile in the states is lower than Henrik Larsson's zip when Chick Young's giving him a blowjob.
Realistically, Rangers and Celtic are the teams people are going to follow from overseas. Celtic have the Irish diaspora to spread their word, and they appear to be heading in the right direction with their 'World Huddle' membership scheme and high-profile Champions World summer tours. If they get it right, because of the vast US-based Irish population, they could do very well indeed.
Rangers, on the other hand, are in a harder position - not least because of their history of bigotry, still perpetuated by many fans. As the article states, image is a big part of brand value; and a bunch of little-Englanders singing No Pope of Rome is not going to make your average Scots-American too proud of his heritage. [You can argue that Celtic and their fans are no angels, but the perception is key here and the perception is that Rangers are historically the bad boys.] There is no natural constituency for Rangers in the US, unlike Celtic's Irish emigrants, so the Gers have a hard task on their hands not to fall behind Celtic in the US. So maybe the best tactic for Rangers is to stall progress, and keep the Scottish league unknown to all but the dedicated few; which is what has happened, but more by accident than design, judging by the business acumen of the aforementioned Murray Jr.
My view? The Scottish League generates so little revenue (#1m/year) from overseas rights that they might as well give them away, in return for an agreement by a decent network (Fox or ESPN or even the Setanta Pub Network) to screen live games for free, every week. Do this for a few years, then follow it up with some (small) club tours against popular opposition - MLS teams or touring English teams - and then bring Scotland in as a guest team in the CONCACAF Cup to get some Tartan Army PR for free. Finally, throw in some soccer tourism to Scotland - after all, how much would your average American sports fan be amazed by the intensity of an Old Firm game, or even a decent Scotland international?
That would establish a core support - and then, the TV rights would be worth something, merchandise could be sold, and the profits ploughed back into the Scottish game. Meaning more pies for Chris Robinson, more biscuits in Celtic's tin, and the Ibrox overdraft falling under #100m. What is there to lose?
Read - Press and Journal
1 comments
Those clever doctors
Quote from Peter Lovenkrand about his recent injury problems:
"The doc has a lot of specialist words for the problem but I know there's a problem on the inside and back of the knee."
Read - Sporting Life
1 comments
"The doc has a lot of specialist words for the problem but I know there's a problem on the inside and back of the knee."
Read - Sporting Life
1 comments
Tuesday, May 11, 2004
Killie for the cup
Kilmarnock defeated Rangers in the under-19 cup final on Monday night, rounding off a miserable season for Rangers - this time last week the young Gers were favourites for the league and cup but ended with neither, just like their big brothers.
Heard at the game from a Killie punter recalling the high point of Norwegian football: "Alex McLeish - your boys took one hell of a beating - and that was just Fernando Ricksen." (cheers Greg)
Read - Herald Sport
0 comments
Heard at the game from a Killie punter recalling the high point of Norwegian football: "Alex McLeish - your boys took one hell of a beating - and that was just Fernando Ricksen." (cheers Greg)
Read - Herald Sport
0 comments
Sunday, May 09, 2004
Parkhead
Went to the Old Firm game yesterday - first visit to Parkhead in a number of years, so first time seeing the 'new' piggery. Certainly an impressive arena on the surface (industry experts assure me it's jerry-built), and you can see why they do well at home - the Celtic fans didn't make a cheep until Sutton's goal at the end but you could tell it's a place that can generate a hell of atmosphere.
Lots of seats with restricted views though, due to various columns and posts - and so nice of Celtic to put all the Rangers fans in the crap seats! (I took my chair home with me though as a souvenir.)
Couple of funny banners spotted in the blue corner:
"Celtic UEFA Cup Champions - Get Real - Villareal"
"Rangers 50 titles - Celtic 39 titles - We welcome the chase" (based on a Bill Struth quote)
Less said about the game the better - daylight robbery as far as I'm concerned. You can see from pictures of Chris Sutton celebrating that he can't believe his luck either.
0 comments
Lots of seats with restricted views though, due to various columns and posts - and so nice of Celtic to put all the Rangers fans in the crap seats! (I took my chair home with me though as a souvenir.)
Couple of funny banners spotted in the blue corner:
"Celtic UEFA Cup Champions - Get Real - Villareal"
"Rangers 50 titles - Celtic 39 titles - We welcome the chase" (based on a Bill Struth quote)
Less said about the game the better - daylight robbery as far as I'm concerned. You can see from pictures of Chris Sutton celebrating that he can't believe his luck either.
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Dodgy finances (3)
Livingston are now trying to hit a May 17 deadline to avoid a ten-point deduction for next season - which would give them a major handicap further hindering any takeover of the club, given that the chances of relegation would be high.
Current owner Dominic Keane seems unwilling to hand over his shares to the new investor - perhaps not surprising given he never agreed that administration was necessary - but if he does prevent the club hitting the deadline, he'll be killing the club. This is presumably posturing by him so he can try to extract at least some cash from the new buyer, which is a pretty poor show, but no more than you expect from a club owner, I guess.
Read - Scotland on Sunday
0 comments
Current owner Dominic Keane seems unwilling to hand over his shares to the new investor - perhaps not surprising given he never agreed that administration was necessary - but if he does prevent the club hitting the deadline, he'll be killing the club. This is presumably posturing by him so he can try to extract at least some cash from the new buyer, which is a pretty poor show, but no more than you expect from a club owner, I guess.
Read - Scotland on Sunday
0 comments
Dodgy Finances (2)
Dundee United are the latest SPL team to make the news because of their financial situation - despite chairman Eddie Thompson's protestations, their financial situation is dire and necessitates big cuts to the wage bill. Which in turn could lead to the likes of Charlie Miller to leave the club, just as Ian McCall is getting things turned around. This doesn't look like another administration job, given they're addressing the problem, but just when you thought the 'shake-out' was almost over, there's more.
Read - Scotland on Sunday (registration required)
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Read - Scotland on Sunday (registration required)
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Dodgy finances (1)
An analysis of Rangers' finances following some financial statements last week published by Rangers' holding company.
Worrying for Rangers fans because it's so complicated - reminds me of Robert Maxwell and how he used to hide all sorts of things in a complex financial structure. It really does sound like Murray has a bit of a house of cards going on.
Read - European football forum
0 comments
Worrying for Rangers fans because it's so complicated - reminds me of Robert Maxwell and how he used to hide all sorts of things in a complex financial structure. It really does sound like Murray has a bit of a house of cards going on.
Read - European football forum
0 comments
Drugs in sport
Female tennis player visits the doctor. "Doctor, doctor, these steroids are making my chest hairy." "Where is the hair growing?" "Well, it starts between my breasts and goes all the way down to my testicles." Boom, boom.
See the picture on Yahoo
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See the picture on Yahoo
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Friday, May 07, 2004
Urban myths and cheap shots
It seems that 20 years after the fact several Celtic players are claiming they were drenched in spit every time they played at Ibrox (MacAvennie makes the same claim). Maybe it's true but the same happened at Celtic Park, and no Celtic player was ever attacked on the park at Ibrox - unlike several Rangers players and one referee at Parkhead, on more than one occasion.
To be fair it's a reasonable article by Nicholas but the last sentence needs to be proven. Maybe he should speak out - he says he was scared to as a player, but he has no excuse now; give us some evidence, Charles. Seems to be a common thread in the Scottish tabloid (and pseudo-broadsheet) press - cheap wee digs at the Tartan Army. Maybe we should follow your behaviour abroad, eh?
Read - Evening Times
0 comments
To be fair it's a reasonable article by Nicholas but the last sentence needs to be proven. Maybe he should speak out - he says he was scared to as a player, but he has no excuse now; give us some evidence, Charles. Seems to be a common thread in the Scottish tabloid (and pseudo-broadsheet) press - cheap wee digs at the Tartan Army. Maybe we should follow your behaviour abroad, eh?
Read - Evening Times
0 comments
Monday, May 03, 2004
Sepp Blatter is a big fat idiot
Not new news but FIFA President Sepp Blatter's comments that draws should be scrapped are almost beneath mention, so contemptible an idea is it. He says that every sport has to have a winner - um - I think if you look closely you'll find that is already the case in football too, Joseph; but every game doesn't need to have a winner to make that happen.
Read - Guardian Sport - 49 more ideas from Sepp Blatter
As it happens I picked up the book 'Badfellas' before heading to Copenhagen last week - it's basically the story of FIFA and its politics, up to and beyond the 2002 FIFA convention when Blatter won an overwhelming majority to continue as president even in the face of massive evidence of corruption. It shows how FIFA was formed, how Havelange took over and instituted enormous cronyism, how the organisation is widely believed to be bankrupt despite record sums of money being made from the World Cup and other tournaments.
Definitely worth a read - even if it does make you want to slit your wrists afterwards. The level of greed in the FIFA inner circle quite frankly beggars belief. And for me it reopened old wounds around the ticketing arrangements for the 1998 World Cup... it's still a disgrace the Scotland-Brazil match was watched by 60,000 'men in suits' while thousands of real supporters watched on TV outside.
Buy the book (Don't worry - I don't make any commission if you do)
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Read - Guardian Sport - 49 more ideas from Sepp Blatter
As it happens I picked up the book 'Badfellas' before heading to Copenhagen last week - it's basically the story of FIFA and its politics, up to and beyond the 2002 FIFA convention when Blatter won an overwhelming majority to continue as president even in the face of massive evidence of corruption. It shows how FIFA was formed, how Havelange took over and instituted enormous cronyism, how the organisation is widely believed to be bankrupt despite record sums of money being made from the World Cup and other tournaments.
Definitely worth a read - even if it does make you want to slit your wrists afterwards. The level of greed in the FIFA inner circle quite frankly beggars belief. And for me it reopened old wounds around the ticketing arrangements for the 1998 World Cup... it's still a disgrace the Scotland-Brazil match was watched by 60,000 'men in suits' while thousands of real supporters watched on TV outside.
Buy the book (Don't worry - I don't make any commission if you do)
0 comments
Sunday, May 02, 2004
GAZZETTA EXCLUSIVE - Rangers' new strikeforce
It is well known that Alex McLeish has been all over Europe looking at new strikers for Rangers, but Gazzetta can exclusively reveal that his extensive Middle-East scouting network has unearthed a pair of hitmen who fit the new Rangers salary structure, and we have managed to acquire a photo of them too.
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Berti's Babes
We may not be the best team in the world but we may be the best-looking. We're definitely not the worst-looking - there are no Scots in the uglyfootballers.com 'Premiership Ugly XI' this season... or is that because there are so few Scottish players to choose?
Lorenzo Amoruso makes an appearance but it's been established that he definitely can't play for Scotland.
Read - uglyfootballers.com
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Lorenzo Amoruso makes an appearance but it's been established that he definitely can't play for Scotland.
Read - uglyfootballers.com
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